I've been struggling with some things and if I just remember that line and actually live it, the struggle should end. The struggles or actually it's only one challenge is that I need to forgive myself. I've written about the horrible things my ex has said and done. I doubt I have forgiveness for him and I sure as hell can't forget about them, but, I need to forgive myself and move along. I need to forgive myself for:
- a failed marriage--it takes two and I did all I could
- an extra curricular experience while I was still married--at the end, but still
- allowing myself to be "lost" for so long, putting his needs before my own
- allowing myself to be put down, ignored, treated poorly, even somewhat abused--not physically, but mentally
- allowing myself to participate in horrible, mean conversation
- allowing myself to be taken advantage of
- fooling myself into thinking that he would do the right thing with my money
So for all of this, I say now that I forgive myself. I am a strong, intelligent, beautiful, confident woman. I will no longer allow myself to be angry with myself or to feel guilty. I will hold my head high, move forward with my life and remember that some things are just scenery along the highway.
I may have future blips on the radar and I hope I remember this phrase.
Until next time, much peace and love.