Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Maya Angelou

I woke up this morning to find that one of my idols, a great woman, a wonderful person, and major contributor to society,  civil rights activist. . . The list goes on . . . Maya Angelou is dead at 86.

I don't usually get caught up in celebrity drama. . . When various actors have died, I may feel sorry for the or family, but I'm not crying over them. Maya on the other hand, I read through my Facebook feed with tears rolling down my face. I started googling all the news stories. Yes, she was old, but what a loss.

She was a major influence on my "growing up" and becoming the woman I am today. So I say to you, Ms. Angelou, you will be missed, but your legacy will live on. You are the ultimate Phenomenal Woman.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014


How in the hell does a dog who spends no time outside or around other animals get fleas?  Ok, she’s around  my cats too, but they aren’t outside either. If I still had carpet, then maybe I would understand, but I haven’t had carpet in over a year, so no eggs or long living fleas. I don’t get it. If they were already in the house, where were they hiding? If they were in the furniture I got in August, why didn’t they come out sooner? In other words… where the hell did they come from?

So, the dog has been bathed multiple times, the cats have been sprayed, and all three have had drops applied, plus the house has been flea bombed. I’ve also sprayed all furniture and soft surfaces.  All clothing, towels, and bedding has been washed. All dishes have been washed, all surfaces and floors cleaned… this was all after the flea bombing… six and a half hours of cleaning. Whew! 

So, fleas are gone right? Nope… still finding a few on the dog… another bath. Let’s see what happens.  Grrrr….
Until next time, much love and peace.

Monday, May 26, 2014

Happy Memorial Day

Happy Memorial Day . . . Today is dedicated to the men and women who have given their lives for our great country. Memorial Day… remembering our fallen soldiers.
If you are enjoying your Memorial Day, remember why you have that luxury and take a moment to give thanks.
Until next time, much peace and love.

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Happy or Right?

I saw this link on Facebook recently, called "Congratulations You're Getting A Divorce."  I started laughing because people are always unsure as to what to say when you tell them you are divorcing or divorced.  My big one was when I changed my name and people thought I got married.  Still don't get that, since they knew I was married already, but whatever.  They always say, "I'm so sorry."  And I say, "Don't be; I'm not."

Here's the deal. I'm not happy that my marriage failed, but . . . I was even more unhappy being married.  It happens.  There were multiple issues, wrongs on the part of both parties, and just not enough "give a shit" to keep going on.  So, the blog talks about being happy or being right.

This is so damn true. Do you want to be happy or do you want to be right? That's the one I had to get through my thick skull . . . I wanted both. Now that it's all said and done, I'm happy to be happy. There were a bunch of bumps and bruises along the way, but I've made it to the other side. Congratulations to me.  To read the blog, click here

It's really well-written and opened my eyes to another ah ha moment.  It's not just the divorce, happy or right, but it's all the stuff I wrote about recently, constantly fighting for every little thing.  It wasn't fighting for anything real, but fighting to be right.  Now, I'm not saying don't fight for things if you need to and some things are definitely worth it . . . even for the principle of the matter . . . but check your priorities and see if it's just to be right or not.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Monday, May 19, 2014

Spa Day

Love my spa day.  I started writing this one last month after going back to the spa after four months off, but I never finished.  Now, I've gone again, and on my birthday last month and again this month.  This may sound indulgent, but I do have a spa membership.  I pay a monthly fee and it covers an 80 minute massage each month, plus the use of the facilities, e.g., steam room, sauna, jacuzzi, quiet room, plus snacks, when I go.  It is my major pampering of myself.

Now--I took a few months off because of money woes--I was able to put my membership on hold for 3 months.  It worked out well, because my massage therapist was out for awhile, taking care of family business.  I started back in March and it was so wonderful, and then I saw her again on my birthday in April.  Extra nice treatment on your birthday.  The only downside was she told me it was her last day. . . she only stayed through that day because she knew it was my birthday.  I thought that was sweet.

So, it was with trepidation that I went yesterday to a new massage therapist.  I was worried, because I had gotten used to the old one.  My worries were for nothing.  The new one has a different technique, but was equally as good as the old.  I felt great afterwards.

My spa day goes something like this . . . steam room for about 20 minutes with a cold towel on my neck, dry sauna for about 10 minutes, misting room (cold mist) for about 2 minutes, jacuzzi for about 10-30 minutes, shower off, robe up and read until time for massage, 80 minute massage, 30-60 minute nap in the quiet room, get dressed and go home.  In between all of this, drinking cucumber or fruit infused water or lemonade, eating fresh fruit, and relaxing.

I love the big, fluffy, white towels (and maybe more than a few have gone home with me) and the spa robe is so comfortable (and maybe one has gone home with me).  I love the smell and the soft music and the atmosphere of calm.  This is one of the best investments in me that I have ever made.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Days Gone By

One of my favorite songs is "Days Gone By" sung by the gorgeous Keith Urban.  It just makes me smile and feel great.  It's talking about losing ourselves in the daily race and to start living for the now. I'm taking this to heart and starting to do a little more with friends here and there, instead of just working and staying at home alone.  Not looking to date anyone . . . although that would be nice if it just starts to happen from one of my outings . . . but we all need to connect with other humans, other than social media.

 I'm probably not supposed to do this, but I'm putting the lyrics here.

"Days Go By"

I'm changing lanes
I'm talking on the phone
I'm drivin' way to fast
And the interstate's jammed with
Gunners like me afraid of coming in last
But somewhere in the race we run
We're coming undone

Days go by
I can feel 'em flying
Like a hand out the window in the wind as the cars go by
It's all we've been given
So you better start livin' right now
'Cause days go by

Out on the roof just the other night
I watched the world flash by
Headlights, taillights running through a river of neon signs
But somewhere in the rush I felt
We're losing ourselves

Days go by
I can feel 'em flying
Like a hand out the window in the wind as the cars go by
It's all we've been given
So you better start livin' right now
'Cause days go by

We think about tomorrow then it slips away
We talk about forever but we've only got today

And the days go by
I can feel 'em flying
Like a hand out the window
As the cars go by

It's all we've been given
So you better start livin'
You better start livin'
Better start livin' right now

Cause days go by
I can feel like 'em flying
Like a hand out the window in the wind as the cars go by

It's all we've been given
So you better start livin' right now

Cause days go by
These days go by

So take 'em by the hand
They're yours and mine
Take 'em by the hand
And live your life
Take 'em by the hand
Don't let 'em all fly by

Come on, Come on now
Don't you know the days go by
    ------Keith Urban

Until next time, much peace and love.

Painting . . . Teenage Style

So, one of the things the Boy has wanted for a long time is to paint his room.  I put it off for years, because I hate to paint.  For this year's birthday though, part of his present was to re-do his room.  He has to do all the work though.  I bought all the stuff to prep and paint, except the paint.  For the last two months, he has been prepping one wall (because we decided to try just one wall at first) and figuring out what color he wanted.  Most of the two months was deciding on a paint color.  He finally decided on a gorgeous gray and I finally was able to purchase it this past week.

On Saturday evening, we went over what he had to do to paint . . . tape off the edges, put down a drop cloth, only put a little paint in the tray at a time, etc.  On Sunday, he started painting while I was at the spa.  I called him on the way home and he said he was at a friend's.  He had done the first coat of paint, but had trouble at the top of the wall, because the tape wouldn't stick to the ceiling.  I got home and it looked great!  

I was concerned though, because we hadn't discussed clean up.  There was a tray of paint sitting out with the roller and brush sitting in it.  Yikes!  Upon closer inspection, there wasn't that much paint in the tray, so it was actually easy for me to finish up the edges for him.  What he neglected though was to pull out the disposable paint trays.  I bought a pack of three.  He left them bundled together, instead of pulling them apart and putting one in the sturdy tray.  It worked out ok--I pulled them apart and put the extras aside.  I also got the roller off of the handle and disposed of everything after I was done.  Yes, I know . . . wasteful and probably not good for the environment, but I don't clean brushes and rollers.  Yuck!

So, he needs to put a second coat on sometime this week or on the weekend and then he can put his room back together.  I told him he did such a good job, and that the paint color is neutral enough, that he can do more walls if he wants.  He'll think about it.  LOL!

Until next time, much peace and love.

Essential Oils

So, I went to a home party the other night for essential oils.  Now, I'm not against the use of natural medications and cures . . . hell, they've been around longer than modern medicine.  I do have a problem with non-medical personnel telling me that something is better for me than the medication prescribed by my physician.  Again, it's not that the idea is wrong, but these people are not trained medical professionals.  While they can say that these essential oils are good for one thing or another, I would like them to preface everything with . . . "consult with your physician before trying anything new" type statement.

Having said all this, I had a great time at my friend's house and did order a couple of items.  These are ones that I know I can't go wrong . . . lavender, peppermint, and lemongrass.  The individual items are quite expensive--I'm told because they are pure and not cut with alcohol or other stuff as you might find in the store.  Of course, I talked to another friend who has been doing oils for years and she orders pure stuff for a lot cheaper.  LOL!  We'll see how this all works out.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Monday, May 12, 2014

Changes Are A’Coming

I actually enjoy my life.  I don’t really have much of a life, but I enjoy it.  I love my job, I love my kid, I love my pets.  I love reading and watching tv and entertaining myself.  I love my spa days, where I can just be a lazy bum and get a massage and relax. 

I’m starting to do a few things with friends.  Recently, I started reconnecting with some girlfriends.  Our kids are besties, but we haven’t spent much time together over the last few years, due to some “issues” that have now been resolved.  We did a Polynesian thing recently.  One of the girls is in the Polynesian club at her school and they put on a luau and dance.  It was pretty awesome—drinks and appetizers at the house prior and a night cap after.  Next scheduled event is the Lavender Festival in June.  It sounds divine   . . . can you just imagine how great it is going to smell?  MMMMMM

I have a work dinner coming up soon.  Hopefully, I’ll be doing more of these soon.  I like the networking idea, and who knows?  I might meet someone interesting.

Anyway, I’m saying yes more often to doing things—as long as it won’t crunch my budget and sounds fun.  I’m also thinking of taking the occasional class to learn something new.  Exploring and keeping my options open.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Vacation Coming Up

I’m starting to get excited for my upcoming vacation. To some, including my son, it doesn’t sound like an exciting time, but to me, I can barely wait.

The Boy and I are doing a driving trip again this year, and one of his friends may be going with us, too.  Driving from California to Arkansas to pick up my mom.  This trip is partly for her 70th birthday.  It’s an early trip because her birthday is in August, but we have not one, but two family weddings during this trip, so we’re doing it early.

After we pick up Momma, we’re going straight to Kentucky.  First stop is at the Quilt Museum in Paducah.  This is the main thing that Momma wanted for her birthday, was to go to the museum, so that’s top priority.  From there, we head to Cincinnati, where the first wedding takes place.  The day after the wedding, we go to another aunt’s house for Momma’s birthday party. From there, she will stay with another aunt (her youngest sister) for a week, while the Boy and I head North to my hometown of Muncie, Indiana.  We will be visiting with my step mom and his other grandparents (my former in-laws), as well as my closest friends.  I’m really looking forward to the 4th of July there.

Then, we head back down to Cincinnati.  We will be going to King’s Island (amusement park) for one day and then we drive down to North Carolina to do some site seeing and wedding number two.  The day after wedding number two, we haul ass to get back to drop Momma off in Arkansas and get back to California.  Total, we’ll be gone for three weeks.  I can’t wait.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Fighting for Everything

There are days that I feel like I’m fighting for every single thing in my life.  It’s as if nothing wants to go smoothly or easily.  I fight to make sure the bills are paid, I fight to make sure my kid is doing what he needs to do, I fight for my position at work, I fight with companies about my bills, I fight fleas for my dog.  You get the picture.  I’m tired of fighting.  I just want things to go smoothly.

So, I’m going to take a deep breath and let it out.  I’m going to take a longer look at the issues and decide if a battle is worth fighting.  This is something that I’ve usually done.  Review the issue to see if it is worth my while.  I take this tactic with my parenting.  Some things, while I don’t condone them, are not worth the daily battle.

I’m not sure why, all of a sudden, everything is a battle, but, I suspect it has something to do with menopause.  My hormones are out of whack, hence more hot flashes, difficulties with appetite control (refer to yesterday’s blog), irritability, and most importantly I don’t sleep.

I’ve kind of figured out the sleep thing.  I’ve just started embracing it.  When I’m tired or sleepy, I sleep or rest.  When I can’t sleep, I get up and do something productive.  My housework tends to get done in the middle of the night now and everything in my place is so totally organized.  I’m an organizational freak, so this actually works for me. 

The only thing that I’m still having a problem with, because of not sleeping,  is getting my work done at work.  I used to be an early bird.  Over the last few years, I’m not as much of an early bird, but still, my morning hours are my productive hours.  These days, my morning hours are not productive at all and somewhere around 2, 3, or 4 pm, I start getting really productive.  This is not necessarily a bad thing, but I end up not leaving the office until 7 or 8 at night.  Again, that’s not necessarily bad either as I miss a lot of nasty traffic.  So, I guess, it’s not that big a deal, I’m just learning to do things differently, instead of battling.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Back At It

It’s been a month since I really went after my goals or even tried to go after them.  It started with my birthday, which was also Easter weekend, and it’s now ending with Mother’s Day.  Apparently, I have problems with holidays.  I don’t usually like to celebrate holidays, mainly because for so many years, ESD made the holidays unbearable for me.  Now that I’m on my own, I have to figure out how to handle the holidays. So far, I haven’t handled them well.  I go off track, don’t exercise, and eat a lot.  Then I get irritated when I don’t feel well, my sugar is out of whack, and I don’t lose weight.

So, today, it all changes.  I’m back on track.  I’m reaffirming my goals that I already set and started achieving.  So here goes.
1.       Blogging 3-5 days a week
2.       Read 5+ books per month
3.       Walk 5-7 days or 10-15 miles per week
4.       Do arm work out 3x per week
5.       Eat properly—lots of veggies, fruits, whole grains, grilled chicken and fish, lots of water
6.       Positive and spiritual affirmations daily

This may sound like a lot, but I was already doing all of this regularly up until April 19th.  So, back at it and positive attitude.  I was feeling really good and I’m actually starting to feel that good again.  My mind is clearer than it has been in a long time.  Sleep eludes me, but I’m more productive than I have been, so something is right.

Until next time, much peace and love.

Thursday, May 1, 2014


Ok, so I've been slacking lately on all my goals. What can I say? April is my birthday month and I got side tracked.  So, I'm going ot spend May re committing to my goals. I'll be posting and commenting on them tomorrow.

Until next time, much peace and love.